HOW TO BRING OUT THE BEST IN THE PEOPLE WHO THINKS-THEY-KNOW-IT-ALL

 BRING OUT THE BEST IN THE THINK-THEY-KNOW -IT-ALL:

  

People who behave like Think-They-Know-It-Alls are driven by the need to get appreciation. When they feel slighted in any way, they're likely to try harder than ever to attract attention. Think-They- Know-It-Alls push their way into conversations where they may not be wanted.

Your goal when dealing with Think-They-Know- It-All is to catch them in their act and give their bad ideas the hook. You'll be most successful if you can avoid putting the Think-They-Know-It-All on the defensive. Here's an action plan for bringing out the best in Think-They-Know-It-Alls.

Give them a little attention. There are two ways to give a Think-They-Know-It-All attention. The first i to backtrack on his or her comments with enthusiasm. This lets the person know that you're paying attention (and it puts these types on the receiving end of their own foolishness). The second way is to acknowledge the person's positive intent, without wasting your time on his or her information: you're giving positive attention without necessarily agreeing with his or her remarks.

Clarify for specifics. If the person doesn't know what he or she is talking about and you do, this should be easy. Ask some revealing questions about the specifics of his or her information. Since Think-They-Know-It- All speak in huge generalizations, pay special attention to words like "everybody" and "always."

Tell it like it is. Carefully redirect the conversation back to reality. Use "I" language to keep your remarks as nonthreatening as possible. To add irrefutable evidence, you can document your facts as you go.

Give them a break. At this point, it has become clear that the Think-They-Know-It-All doesn't know what he or she is talking about and that you do. Resist the temptation to embarrass the person. Instead, give him or her a way out, minimizing the chance that the Think-They-Know-It-All will go on the defensive. Think-They-Know-It-Alls are not as attached to their ideas as Know-It-Alls. If you give them a way to go along with you, chances are they'll be ready to jump on your bandwagon.

Break the cycle. Once people believe someone is just a Think-They-Know-It-All, they may stop giving that person any recognition at all, even when he or she deserves it. But that increases the Think-They- Know-It-All's need for appreciation, so he or she engages in that behavior even more. "Break the cycle" means be ready to give credit where credit is due. Notice what this problem person is doing right and praise him or her for it. For some people, this attention will be all that's necessary to get the problem behavior to subside. With others, use a gentle confrontation to tell them the truth about the con- sequences of their negative behavior. Adjust your attitude:
Don't burst their bubble: When you challenge Think- They-Know-It-Alls directly, their only way out is to counterattack with ever grander claims. And their conviction could sway others who don't know any better.
Don't be too quick to judge: We've all defended ideas that we didn't necessarily believe to be true.

"Think-They-Know-It-Alls can't fool all of the people all of the time, but they can fool some of the people enough of the time and enough of the people all of the time-all for the sake of getting some attention."

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