"GET IT RIGHT" INTENSION TO APPROACH DIFFICULT PEOPLE

 UNDERSTAND THE SECOND INTENSION


GET IT RIGHT:

Getting it right is another task-focused intent that influences behavior. Have you ever sought to avoid a mistake by doing everything possible to prevent it from happening? When getting it right is your highest priority, you slow things down enough to see the details. You probably take a good, long look before leaping-if you ever leap at all. You may avoid taking any action because you feel unsure about what might happen as a result.

When the intent to get it right becomes thwarted or threatened, everything around this person begins to seem haphazard and careless. To add insult to injury, people seem to address these concerns with increasingly fuzzy terms. When sufficient intensity is reached, the result is increasingly pessimistic and perfectionist. The Whiner, the No Person, and the Nothing Person all exemplify this behavior.

The Whiner. In our imperfect world, the Whiner believes that he or she is powerless to create change. Burdened and overwhelmed by all the uncertainty around what can go wrong, Whiners abandon all thought of solutions. Instead, as the feeling of hopelessness increases, they focus on any problems that can be used as evidence for their massive generalization. They begin to whine, "Nothing is right. Everything is wrong." This, of course, serves only to drive everybody else crazy-and the deteriorating situation provokes further whining.

The No Person. Unlike the Whiner, the No Person does not feel helpless in the face of things going wrong. Instead, the No Person becomes hopeless. Certain that what is wrong will never be set right, No People have no inhibition about letting others know how they feel. "Forget it, we tried that. It didn't work then, it won't work now, and you're kidding yourself if anyone tells you different. Give up and save yourself from wasted effort on a lost cause." This attitudinal black hole pulls others into the No Person's personal pit of despair.

The Nothing Person. When events fail to measure up to the standard of perfection, some people get so totally frustrated that they withdraw completely. There may be one last shout at the powers that before failing to get it right: "Fine! Do it your way. Don't come crying to me if it doesn't work out!" From that point on they say and do nothing

Recognize that the intent to get it right can lead to perfectionist behaviors: This can express itself as the whining of the Whiner, the negativity of the No Person, or the silent withdrawal of the Nothing Person. But what they all have in common is their sureness that nothing works out positively.

"When getting it right is your highest priority, you will likely slow things down enough to see the details .... You may even refuse to take action because of a particular doubt about the consequences."

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